We were having a chat in the boozer about what we’d like to do before we kick the bucket. Along with all the usual ideas, like go to space with Richard Branson, bungee jump, go up in a hot-air balloon, etc, these were some of the more crazy things on our lists…
1. Who’s a *@%$** boy, then?!
Teach your gran’s parrot to swear, nothing too crude, you understand, but a word that will most definitely shock her straightlaced visitors.
2. Be a record breaker
Ed Sheeran managed to hold 52 Maltesers in his mouth (both extradinary and random in equal measure). Now you want to break a record, or even create your own crazy stunt. Bathing in taramasalata or something!
3. My robot…
Hire a robot (not a scary synth like in Channel 4’s Humans, but a nice friendly one). Take it down the pub and send it to the bar all night to get you and your mates drinks and snacks of your choice.
4. The eagle has landed
Learn falconry so that you can have an eagle fly off into the distance swoop back, fly over and land spectacularly on your arm.
5. Move over, Miley!
Have the chance to operate a wrecking ball and knock down a really ugly building that’s currently a blight on the landscape.
6. Live the high life
Dress up crazily and walk on stilts in along the street. Then, when passers-by come towards you, lurch awkwardly in their direction, as if you’re going to topple on top of them.
7. Non-pop fun
Use one of those hard-skin removers on a balloon like the one you’ve seen in the advert to see if it really is so gentle that it doesn’t burst…
8. All fall down…
Create an elaborate and long domino-falling course so when you knock the first one over, the tumbling that follows is truly stunning and jaw dropping.
9. Trick or treat?
Learn how to do a really baffling magic trick that will amaze your family and friends and under no circumstances let on how it’s done.
10. Moo-ving experience
Initially tipping a cow over was suggested. But we decided that this was so very wrong that we rejected that idea and went for milking a cow instead!
11. Salad daze
Go to a one-visit-only salad bar and use clever layering to get a tower of the cold stuff piled sky high and walk cockily past the management balancing the gravity defying spectacle.
12. Hop to it
Draw a hopscotch grid on the pavement in your street and play the game, but with other grown-ups only – no children allowed, however much they plead.
13. Top bombing!
Do a massive bomb into a swimming pool and splash as many sunbathers lying obliviously around the side as possible…
What crazy things do you have on your bucket list?