Made you look! This is a buttock-free zone. But we are celebrating some of the silliest place names in Britain, all of which contain the word bottom! Who knew we were such a cheeky island..?


1. Biggest

Six Mile Bottom, Cambridgeshire

2. Smallest

Goldfinch Bottom, Berkshire

3. Fastest

Galloping Bottom, Somerset

4. Slowest

Snail’s Bottom, Somerset

5. Laziest

Slack Bottom, West Yorkshire

6. Coldest

Winterbottom, Cheshire

7. Hottest

Burnt Bottom, Dorset

8. Most luxurious

Velvet Bottom, Somerset

9. Most unwelcome

Knights in the Bottom, Dorset

10. Rowdiest

Drunken Bottom, Oxfordshire

11. Cheekiest

Flash Bottom, Staffordshire

12. Fruitiest

Strawberry Bottom, Surrey

13. Most generous

Charity Bottom, Dorset

14. Most patriotic

Britain Bottom, Gloucestershire

15. Sweetest

Honeybottom, Berkshire

16. Cheesiest

Cheese Bottom, South Yorkshire

17. Woodiest

Timberbottom, Greater Manchester

18. Most inconvenient

Moneydown Bottom, Wiltshire

19. Least welcome in a confined space

Rotten Bottom, Dumfries

20. Most in need of medical attention

Torhole Bottom, Somerset

21. Most distracting

Scratchy Bottom, Dorset

22. Most joyful

Happy Bottom, Dorset

23. Least joyful

Breakheart Bottom, Wiltshire

24. Most unacceptable in public

Lickham Bottom, Devon

25. Best bottom-based insult

Bottomhead, Stirling


All these Bottoms and more are part of Strumpshaw, Tincleton & Giggleswick’s Cheeky Map of Great British Bottoms. Perfect for your lavvy wall!